10.26.2015
Media

Anonymous

I had just ended my 3 year relationship with my highschool sweetheart.

I thought I would be marrying this guy and when I met the man I was pregnant with I thought I was escaping my problems. I thought it was just going to be a fling. I knew he was married but he said it was a forced marriage because his wife had become pregnant and he was going to divorce her. Time passed and I notice it was all a lie we were always secretive about us and will only see each other when it was convenient for him.

At some point in the relationship I knew I was done with it at first it was OK what we had because after my previous relationship I didn’t want nothing serious but I was ready to move on to the next level of our relationship after almost a 1 year and half with him and he said he couldn’t. I decided to ended it and he didn’t want to, he insisted we would work it out somehow. I manage to stay away from him for about 2 months but again he seduced me and I caved in after that we continue to see each other in secret, I knew I was doing wrong and I wanted to end what we had but I couldn’t. I had developed a connection to him and desire that was beyond my control, I was on birth control but when I left him the first time I stopped it and never went back on it. I never imagine I was going to get pregnant with him and when I missed my period I thought I was just late but when 2 weeks passed and I did a pregnancy test to confirm what I was hoping was not happening to me, I broke down. I was 22 and there was no way I was ready to have a child, financially I was stable and I knew the child will be missing nothing but mentally I was still a child myself and was in no condition to raise this child by myself. I schedule an appointment to get abortion the following week. I did all my research and knew I could get a medical abortion since I was only 4 weeks , when I had my sonogram done to see how far I was in the pregnancy I found out I was having twins. I was scared but I knew I couldn’t bring these babies into the world without a father. I had my abortion and yes there was pain lots of it but I know for me it was the right thing to do. I hated this man and blamed him at first but now after a few weeks have passed i accepted what I now know was both our faults him for lies and me for allowing him.