I’m a mother of 3 wonderful children. An 11 year old daughter, 8 year old son and almost 2 year old son. When I found out I was pregnant with my daughter, abortion to me was never an option at that time. When I found out I was pregnant with my 2nd child, my 8 year old son, I still didn’t consider abortion to be an option even though my boyfriend (now husband) did not want another child. 2 months after giving birth to my 2nd child I wanted to get my tubes tied, but guess what, I was pregnant again! No way could I handle a 3rd child at that time, I had to get an abortion and I knew it. I tried the pill, I tried the NuvaRing, I tried the depo shot. Nothing was working for me. Then it happened again, I was pregnant again. Now I felt I was in a predicament as I knew, fairly well, an employee at the clinic I had to go to and I was absolutely mortified that she would see me there again and judge me. She didn’t and NEVER will. After my 2nd abortion I decided it was time to try the mirena. That did well for 2 years, and then it came out. 7 months later, pregnant again. You may be wondering, why didn’t I go back to get my tubes tied after my first abortion? Life happens. I had 2 small children and they were my life, I didn’t take the best care of myself. Back to the clinic. I now had 3 abortions under my belt, these people must think I am a monster. Another year came and went and I was pregnant again. I made an appointment, I went to the appointment, but was unable to pay so I walked out crying, thinking my husband is going to leave me, we can not have another child. It was right before Christmas – by the time I would have enough money to cover the costs, I would be too far along. Well, we knew then, that we had to go through with this pregnancy and we now have 3 wonderful children. I often find myself wondering what if it was another girl, what if this, what if that…well I will tell you this? What if abortion was not available to me? I don’t know, but it probably wouldn’t be good. I would not be where I am now. EVERY time I had to visit the clinic, I was never judged for my decisions inside. The outside world was a different story. No one knows how many abortions I have had, but I wanted to share, because I know I can’t be the only one and I want others to know that if you’ve had multiple abortions, you’re not a monster. We all have to make the decisions that are best for us and our families.