I was 22. I had just graduated from college and recently accepted into a teaching credential program. My ex-boyfriend and I just moved in together, everything was going in the direction it was supposed to.
He was much older than me, he wanted kids and a family and to move back to Spain. All of that it scared me, to death. I was just figuring out my life, I couldn’t take on the responsibility of bringing another life into this world. I never even thought about it. Until I realized I skipped my period, I had a craving for Sprite like I have never had before and it seemed that overnight I had a bladder the size of an almond. I took a test and it had two lines, my heart skipped a beat or two. This couldn’t happen to me. I went to a clinic they talked to me when I told them I wanted an abortion they told me “that is not what God wants”. You see I have PKU, if I don’t follow my diet when pregnant the baby is likely to be mentally retarded or physically handicapped. I couldn’t live with that risk. They told me babies are resistant they fight through this and when I told them I wanted to teach Special Education they told me “I don’t understand why you think you wouldn’t be the perfect mother for this child”. I wanted to scream, I wanted to cry, I wanted to wake up from this nightmare. I told no one. I went to Planned Parenthood and they saved me. A week later I took the pill. I didn’t tell anybody, except one single soul. Just in case something went wrong. I can remember it like it was yesterday, I was crying in the bathroom and just flushed a heartbeat out to sea and my boyfriend stood on the other side of the door screaming at me. He didn’t know the battle I was facing, he had no idea what I was going through. The next morning I was okay, I was alive and I was relieved. I saved a child that would have most likely had little to no life. I am okay with that. I knew at that moment my relationship was over, and I have been ashamed until now. Thank you.