03.25.2015
Media

Anonymous

It was my junior year in high school and I was 17 years old, A and B honor roll student and, I had been with my boyfriend for about 5 years that year. The day before Valentines day, year of 2015, I had found out I was pregnant,the first person I told was him, he was thrilled, I on the other hand was not.

I was not ready to bring a child into a world of struggle, when I was still struggling to keep up with school work and my part-time job. I held off telling my parents for about 2 weeks, my mom had figured it out when my tampons hadn’t even been touched. She tried to convince me to have an abortion, but my mind was set at that time that I would have this baby. That I couldn’t have an abortion because it was what I was against. My grandmother had talked to me about 2 days later and it took me to have an emotional break down to realize that it just wasn’t the right time to bring a child into this world, I wanted to be able to give my child a life without struggle, and being at the age of 17,that was not possible. My mom and grandma took me to the clinic and it was a 2 day process, the first day was the longest day of my life, I dreaded going to the back rooms, but I kept telling myself it was something I had to do, when the nurse did the ultrasound I found out I was 6 weeks and 6 days pregnant and almost 7 weeks as of the second day or the process. I had 2 options surgical or medical abortion. That night I said goodbye to it… It was hard but I knew it was right for the both of us, the second day was a drag on, they called me back 2 hours late and the procedure had started, I don’t remember feeling anything at all, I went completely numb, after the nurse had asked my if I was alright and I broke down again, she hugged me and said everything will be all right, and that I had a high future ahead of me. The nurse had guided me to the recovery room, and sat me down and went to go get my mom for me, my mom just sat there with me and hugged me as tight as she could, after about 30 minutes I was allowed to go home. Its been about a month since my abortion, and I have to say its a matter of time for me, I just realize that I have to forgive my self because I have to move on with my life, I still have senior year to look forward to, and college. My boyfriend and I are still together, its been tough but we’ve been through a lot these last couple of years. To say all in all I don’t regret a thing, because I knew I wasn’t ready, I have already been forgiven by the most important person. To say I hope my story helps some of the women who read the stories, I know these stories helped me get through it.