I am too young, too naive, too irresponsible, and without the resources to raise a child. The first time I found out I was pregnant there was no consideration of my options: I immediately knew I would get an abortion.

The decision was painless. Often I wonder if I am a monster; I felt nothing in a situation where so many women feel so much. I’ve never looked back, never had any regrets. This past week I found out that I’m pregnant again. Immediately I called the local clinic and made an appointment for an abortion for next week. And then I laid down and cried. I feel something this time. It does not change my decision or make me consider keeping the baby. But I feel a deep pain within me.