my mother got pregnant at 15, became a mom at 16 through bad choices, at 16 i became pregnant too. i knew i didn’t want to keep this baby, i was just a baby myself! , and wasn’t able to be a good mom at that age, though she did keep and raise my brother. but we both knew that this was not to be encouraged. through bad choices, at 16 i became pregnant too. i knew i didn’t want to keep this baby, i was just a baby myself! i had plans of college and a bright future, and knew this wasn’t the right time to start a family.
my mother felt the same way, and took me to have an abortion. at the time, i felt like i was bearing satan’s child, or something evil inside of me, but that’s just a reflection of how f-ed up teenagers thinking can be. i guess i just felt like i had to get this thing out of me. as an adult, obviously my feelings about it have changed. i didn’t regret it, still don’t, though i have asked that baby’s soul to forgive me and am at peace with my decision. i promised myself i wouldn’t have another one though, and the next two times i was pregnant i gave birth to my wonderfully life-altering, dream-come-true daughters.
unfortunately, several years after my second child was born, i became pregnant again during a very bad time in my life. i was struggling financially, ill with depression, and pregnant by a man addicted to drugs. i wasn’t well enough mentally to have another child, especially by such a man, especially when i was so depressed i could barely care for myself, let alone others. so my mother helped me again and i ended the pregnancy. i know i made the right choice for me and my family each time. it is not easy to decide to bring/allow a life into the world, nor is it easy to decide not to. but i feel blessed to live in a country where i am free to make the choice for myself.