I have been unintentionally pregnant on birth control. The pill failed me, the patch failed me, condoms failed me, and the depo shot failed me. My first pregnancy was at age 15 and ended in a miscarriage. I became pregnant again at age 17, and had to fight my parents tooth and nail to give that baby up for adoption because I was in such severe denial that I willfully ignored the signs in my body for nearly six months until the pregnancy could no longer be ignored.
At 20 years old, again, I found myself pregnant while on birth control, and I couldn’t face either having a child or going through another adoption. I opted for an abortion, and I am so grateful that I had that option. It was so much easier on my body and my emotions compared to the adoption, and I probably would have committed suicide if I had been forced to carry yet another unwanted baby to term.
A year later, I met my future husband, and even though we planned to wait, I got pregnant on our honeymoon — this time while I was on the patch. We had our first child together, and three months after giving birth, I found myself pregnant again — this time in spite of the depo shot. I have since had my tubes tied. I have been through every possible pregnancy outcome, and I can tell you…as difficult as it has been to raise children in a relationship,
I would have drowned trying to raise those kids as a kid myself. Adoption was horrific, like going through hell. People try to convince you that it’s the better choice, but I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. Having to go through the entire physical agony of pregnancy and childbirth, and then the hormone roller coaster of post-pregnancy and lactation without a child, were by far harder than the abortion.
I am so grateful for the doctors that helped me with my abortion. I was in no position at that time in my life to become a mother. I had to do a lot of therapy after I became a mother to be a decent one because of all the emotional scars. All of these anti-abortion people have no idea what it’s like…to be pregnant and abandoned and have no money and no support system. Sure, they’ll urge you to stay pregnant, but when that baby comes, who is going to take care of you? Who is going to pay the bills? We need to worry about taking care of all of the people who are already in this world rather than forcing unwilling mothers to bring more babies into it. How great a life is the child of an unwilling mother going to have anyway? Keep abortion legal. Every woman should be able to decide their own fate, and no outside person is equipped to know what is best for that person.