05.26.2016
Media

Anonymous

I am a 50 year old married woman who had an abortion when I was 46. It was a ‘miracle’ that I became pregnant at such a late age and everyone told me it was my last chance to have a baby. Needless to say I was terrified as it was also deemed risky by my doctor. At the time I was suffering from depression, not sure I really wanted kids and having marital problems so I made the choice to end the pregnancy. At the time it seemed like the right thing to do but today I regret it. There, I said it. Do I wish I could go back and undo what I did? Yes, but I would not wish the choice would go away. Because life has its moments and we each choose our path. Abortion is the right choice for so many women as each circumstance is personal and unique – it is not black and white or right or wrong. It was my choice and am grateful for that at that point in time. Even those of us who regret our abortion can understand that we own that decision and cannot blame the provider or any other entity.
I now have to accept that I will never have a child of my own and that is my cross to bear. As much as it pains me now I still firmly believe in the freedom to choose even if that choice later feels like a mistake.