I was 25, single & pregnant by a man from across the country. Both of us just returning from a trip that we quit our dead end jobs to go on. Neither of us wanted or could afford a child at this point in our lives. During this trip, before I realized I was pregnant, I was taking meds to help me sleep and taking pain meds like it was my job, because I couldn’t figure out what was wrong with me. I also drank a lot.

Now, I know I messed up, I got pregnant, I had unprotected sex. I know. I just don’t believe a child should be a punishment for a mistake. And with all of the other factors I knew I couldn’t keep the pregnancy. I don’t regret having an abortion, but it does make me sad, especially since I found out my best friend was 1 week ahead of my pregnancy. Her baby is a week older than mine would have been, and I’ll have to see him for the rest of my life. Also I’ve always known I didn’t want children of my own and that I wanted to be a foster parent instead. Now in some weird way I feel unqualified to be a foster parent, to be a mother.

It was all or nothing for me. Abortion or have and raise a baby by myself. I had a really hard time deciding what I was going going to do. Ultimately, I chose to make myself better, more responsible, less selfish, and financially stable before bringing a baby into the world.