I was 18 and with the man of my dreams. Life was perfect. Or at least I acted like it was. I had always been Pro-Life and when I got that positive pregnancy test just 5 months into the relationship, I knew the already-father-of-one would be just as excited as I was. He wasn’t. He said that it was my choice what we did, but that his personal opinion was that it was not the right time for a child. I went ahead and found an Ob/Gyn and scheduled an appointment. I was unsure of what I would do. The doctor performed an ultrasound and told me that I was almost 6 weeks and it was a healthy pregnancy. As I left the office, I was met by a family. The wife had an ultrasound picture as well. We were both about 6 weeks. It was their 4th child. They congratulated me. I cried the entire way home. I knew I could not give that baby a good life. Our bills were barely paid each month, he was going through a nasty custody battle, I had a low-paying and demanding job. He knew of a clinic, so he called. They told him that they had to speak with me directly, so I called them later that day. The procedure was scheduled. My mother begged me not to go through with it. But, the decision was made. That morning we took my boyfriend’s son to daycare and were headed to the clinic from there. I was nervous. That morning just so happened to be my first morning of sickness. We had to stop at a gas station for me to throw up. I sat there, on that dirty bathroom floor wondering if I was making the right choice. What no one wants to realize is that abortion is never the first choice, it’s always the last choice. We pulled up to the abandoned-looking building in Austin, TX. There was a security gate that I had always seen closed, passing that building every day, never knowing it was this; an abortion clinic. They were obviously discreet. I had to press a button to speak with someone inside. I told them my name and they opened the doors. I walked into a hallway with 3 doors. Only one was open, and the other rooms were completely empty. There was one girl sitting on a couch in the “lobby”. There was a window where a woman with a polite smile sat. I signed the forms she gave me and paid her for the procedure. Before I could even think, she called me back. She counseled me. She explained that it was only her and her husband in the multi-story office. He was the doctor, she was the nurse. I asked her a ton of questions and she gave me straight-forward, honest answers. She asked me multiple times if this was my choice. She told me that if I was not there by my own free will, they could help me out. I knew at any time I could stop it. And, part of me thought I would. But, I didn’t. After the counseling session was complete I was sent back into the lobby for them to prepare everything. I never thought this would be me. A few minutes later they called me back again. This time to an examination room. The wife performed an ultrasound, keeping the screen tilted away from me. I didn’t understand why until afterwards, and she didn’t know that I had already had an ultrasound, and I kept the picture. The doctor came in and introduced himself. He had a kind, understanding face. They started an IV and I remember thinking, right before falling asleep, if I should say “stop” or not. I didn’t, and then I woke up. It was over. I don’t remember pain that first moment. The wife helped me put my clothes back on and led me back to the office she had counseled me in. There was one of those long chairs that you could lay on, and she let me sit there and sleep for a while. The majority of my time in the clinic was spent in that chair. When I finally woke up on my own, she gave me a care package with different types of contraceptives, non-medicated of course, along with the prescriptions for my pain killers. They told me if I had any questions or concerns to call them. I walked away with my boyfriend’s help and he drove us to our house. I stayed in bed that day. It’s been 5 years and I have learned more about abortion than I could have ever thought possible. I’ve had people say that abortion is murder. When I reveal to them that I am this so-called “killer” in which they speak of, they all of a sudden lose the will to speak. I recently went public in my blog, to reveal that I had an abortion. It’s time to step forward. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. And, for now at least, it is a legal medical procedure. And, I will fight to keep this legal. Not because I am “anti-life”, I have had 3 children since, but because losing the ability to obtain a safe and legal abortion would more than ruin this country, it would be a travesty of justice for all women. At first, I was going to remain anonymous. But, the point of this is to put a face to abortion. I would tell my story to a crowd full of protesters if it would protect even one woman from having to endure the torture that is the Pro-Life movement.