01.28.2016
Media

Anonymous

I was 20 years old and dating the love of my life… We got pregnant and were terrified but were coming to terms. He was in a prestigious school in a large city a few hours away. We had just about accepted the news at 10 weeks when I went in for an ultrasound and found out that we had a missed miscarriage (the baby did not survive but my body did not expel it). The overwhelming sense of calm was what really tipped me off… I was not ready. He was very upset and made me feel guilty for not being more upset… Soon after he sabotaged my birth control and I fell pregnant again. At this point I was considering leaving him but suddenly felt trapped. I told him what I was going to do and he begged me not to. I went to a private clinic and had the procedure done. Everyone was very nice, even when I knocked my cup of pee all over everywhere walking from the restroom to the exam room. I live in a state where I was required to view the ultrasound, but it did not deter me. I knew what I wanted. The procedure was not bad at all, but the medication I had to take for the next few days made my moods unpredictable and I cried a lot. We are no longer in contact but he still tells people about the “terrible” thing I did. 7 Years later, I am still happy about the choice I made.