I was 20 and had been with my boyfriend for over a year when birth control failed.

As college students, we both knew we were not ready to become parents. My boyfriend, who was adopted, always told me that if we were to become pregnant, he would only support adoption. Knowing that he wouldn’t be a supportive parent, nor a supportive partner at the abortion, I chose to keep the pregnancy a secret and to to my abortion alone.

I still wonder “what if” now and again, but I have no doubt that I made the right choice. That boyfriend and I are both happily married, to other individuals, living on opposite sides of the country.

For any women out there struggling with this, remember to be gentle to yourself – and know that making the choice that is BEST for you is not selfish, but healthy.