Verbal |
|
Examples |
S-1. Listening |
Focusing on the present; not bringing up past problems or mistakes; creating safety to express anything |
I feel that right now you need me to just listen to you. |
S-2. Praising |
Giving earned rewards frequently; recognizing efforts rather than products or end results |
You worked so long and so hard on the project. |
S-3. Feeling |
Sharing feelings such as anger, joy, and frustration; using "I" statements |
I feel …
I'm so angry when you …
I love you. |
S-4. Respecting |
Letting others make decisions; avoiding judging and advising; trying to help him/her make his/her own decisions |
It's your choice.
What can I do to help you? |
S-5. Listening |
Identifying the feeling as well as the content and asking the person to confirm it |
It sounds like you were very frustrated by the class change. Is that right? |
S-6. Trusting |
Being consistent; asking for input and understanding that children need to learn in their own way even if they make mistakes |
I know you will be thoughtful and responsible. |
S-7. Affirming |
Finding the positive to express |
You are so competent.
You make me happy when you … |
S-8. Reflective Listening |
Reflecting what another says; paraphrasing a person's words so he/she know he/she has been heard |
You sound angry about your friend's response. Is that so? |
S-9. Clarifying |
Asking for more information when unsure |
Could you tell me more about your fight with your friend? |
Nonverbal |
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Examples |
S-10. Acting |
Finding physical ways to show care, concern, and attention |
Making eye contact; touching when appropriate; hugging; staying near the person |