|
Verbal |
|
Examples |
|
S-1.
Judging |
Making
a judgment |
You
should …
You
ought to … |
|
S-2.
Rejecting |
Giving
no support |
It's
your problem, not mine. |
|
S-3.
Blaming/Criticizing |
Placing
fault on the other person |
It's
your fault. |
|
S-4.
Labeling |
Calling
names or words that are negative |
Only
a dummy would do it that way. |
|
S-5.
Transferring |
Not
listening and jumping in with one's own
problems |
Let
me tell you what happened to me. |
|
S-6.
Ordering |
Giving
solutions with no choices |
You
must do this now. |
|
S-7.
Threatening/Bribing |
Using
threats or bribes to try to make someone
do something |
If
you don't do what I want …
If
you do what I want, I'll do this for
you. |
|
S-8.
Waffling |
Not
being clear and consistent in setting
limits |
Well,
maybe …
We'll
see …
I'll
think about it … |
|
S-9.
Nagging |
Persistently
repeating orders or requests |
I've
told you a thousand times …
How
many time do I have to ask you to … |
|
Nonverbal |
|
Examples |
|
S-10.
Acting |
Using
body language that sends negative messages
or that rebuffs; being physically abusive |
Crossing
arms; not looking at speaker; walking
away; tapping feet; shaking finger in
face; hitting; kicking |
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