Growth and Development, Ages 13 to 17—What Parents Need to Know
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Human development is a lifelong process of physical,
behavioral, cognitive, and emotional growth and change.
In the early stages of life—from babyhood to childhood,
childhood to adolescence, and adolescence to adulthood—enormous
changes take place. Throughout the process, each person
develops attitudes and values that guide choices, relationships,
and understanding.
Sexuality is also a lifelong process. Infants, children, teens, and adults
are sexual beings. Just as it is important to enhance a young person's physical,
emotional, and cognitive growth, so it is important to lay foundations for
an adolescent's sexual growth. Adults have a responsibility to help young people
understand and accept their evolving sexuality.
Each stage of development encompasses specific markers. The following developmental
guidelines apply to most young people in this age group. However, each adolescent
is an individual and may reach these stages of development earlier or later
than other teens the same age. When concerns arise about a specific teen's
development, parents or other caregivers should consult a doctor or other adolescent
development professional.
Physical Development
Most teens ages 13 to 17 will:
- Complete puberty and the physical
transition from childhood to adulthood
- Reach nearly their adult height, especially females
[Males continue to grow taller into their early twenties.]
Cognitive Development
Most teens ages 13 to
17 will:
- Attain cognitive maturity—the
ability to make decisions based on knowledge of
options and their consequences
- Continue to be influenced
by peers [The power of peer pressure lessens after
early adolescence.]
- Build skills to become self-sufficient
- Respond to media messages
but develop increasing ability to analyze those
messages
- Develop increasingly mature
relationships with friends and family
- Seek increased power over
their own lives
- Learn to drive, increasing their independence
Emotional Development
Most teens ages 13 to 17 will:
- Have the capacity to develop
long-lasting, mutual, and healthy relationships,
if they have the foundations for this development—trust,
positive past experiences, and an understanding
of love
- Understand their own feelings
and have the ability to analyze why they feel a
certain way
- Begin to place less value on appearance and more on
personality
Sexual Development
Most teens ages 13 to 17 will:
- Understand that they are sexual
and understand the options and consequences of
sexual expression
- Choose to express their sexuality
in ways that may or may not include sexual intercourse
- Recognize the components of
healthy and unhealthy relationships
- Have a clear understanding
of pregnancy and of HIV and other sexually transmitted
infections and the possible consequences of sexual
intercourse and have the ability to make reasoned choices about
sex
based on knowledge
- Recognize the role media play
in propagating views about sex
- Have the capacity to learn
about intimate, loving, long-term relationships
- Have an understanding of their own sexual orientation
[This is different than sexual behavior]
What Families Need to Do to Raise Sexually Healthy Adolescents
To help teens ages 13 to 17 develop as sexually healthy youth, families should:
- Clearly
articulate your family and religious values regarding
sexual intercourse. Express that, although sex
is pleasurable, young people should wait to initiate
sex until they
are in a mature, loving, and responsible relationship.
- Express that we all have a
variety of options for experiencing intimacy and
expressing love.
- Discuss together the factors,
including age, mutual consent, protection, contraceptive
use, love, intimacy, etc., that you and your teen
believe should be a part of decisions about sexual intercourse.
- Reinforce teens' ability to
make decisions while providing information on which
they can base those decisions.
- Discuss
contraceptive options and talk about the
importance of condom use.
Discuss teens' options, should unprotected intercourse
occur—including
emergency contraception and STI testing and treatment. Discuss teens'
options, should pregnancy occur, including abortion,
parenting, and adoption.
- Discuss exploitive behavior
and why it is unhealthy and (in some cases) illegal.
Help youth identify various physical and verbal
responses to avoid/get away from sexual situations
that make them feel uncomfortable.
- Acknowledge that teens have
many future life options, that some may marry and/or
parent while others may remain single and/or childless.
- Use inclusive language that
recognizes that some youth may be gay, lesbian,
bisexual, or transgender.
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