Diagramming My Family Print

A Lesson Plan from Life Planning Education: A Youth Development Program (Chapter Four)

NOTE:  Life Planning Education (LPE) is currently being revised. The printed/for-sale version includes an older version of this lesson plan. Please make sure you have looked at the PDF of Life Planning Education before purchasing - that is the version that is available to buy.

Purpose:   
To clarify the definition of ‘family’ and determine the nature of relationships in families

Materials:   
Newsprint and markers; sheets newsprint; crayons, colored pencils and/or markers

Time:        30-40 minutes

Planning Notes:

  • Before conducting this activity, decide whether it is appropriate for your group. If it is not, select another activity.
  • This activity helps participants realize the connections they have to special people in their lives. Allow the participants to define family in whatever way they wish. Ask them not to limit their definition to one type.
  • Draw your personal family ‘portrait’, poster-sized, as explained in Step 3. Depict at least three important relationships.
  • On the board or newsprint, write out these questions for participants’ use:
(a)    Who are the people you consider your family?
(b)    Which family members do you spend the most time with?
(c)    Which family members do you feel closest to?
(d)    Where is the greatest conflict in your family relationships?

Procedure:

  1. Point out that almost everyone’s first relationships are with a parent or parents. But by this time, adolescents may feel closer to one or more adults who is not their parent. At the same time, parents may feel that other people’s adolescents are much better behaved and loving than their own. Those feelings are all normal.
  2. Ask participants to take a serious look at their families and the nature of their relationships. Display the questions you want them to consider, that is the four questions you prepared beforehand.
    • (a)    Who are the people you consider your family?
    • (b)    Which family members do you spend the most time with?
    • (c)    Which family members do you feel closest to?
    • (d)    Where is the greatest conflict in your family relationships?
  3. Explain the instructions for this activity
    • Draw a diagram of your family using circles to represent different family members. Represent yourself as a circle and color in the shape completely so it stands out from the others.
    • Include all the people you consider part of your family. These are people who are part of your everyday world and have ongoing importance in your life. They do not have to live in your household or be related to you by birth or marriage.
    • When you have finished drawing, use loops to connect your personal symbol with two or three other family members’ symbols. These connecting loops will illustrate your most important family relationships.
    • Describe your other important family relationships. Use symbols, colors, words, lines or anything else to show the nature of their feelings between you and your family members. For example, if you feel one of your parents does not trust you, you could write DISTRUSTS in the space between you and that parent.
    • When finished, draw a frame around the portrait. Decorate it in any way you wish.
  4. Display your family ‘portrait’ and explain it. Ask the group to identify one or two examples of the relationships in your family, based on the elements in the portrait.
  5. Distribute paper and drawing materials to all participants. Allow 15 minutes to work.
  6. When time is up, ask for volunteers who will share their family ‘portrait’ with the group. Have each describe the members of her or his family and explain the nature of one or two relationships. Allow as much time as possible for the volunteers to share.
  7. Conclude the activity using the discussion points below.

Discussion Points:

  1. What have you discovered about a relationship in your family?
  2. What things are the same in many families? (Answers should include, but are not limited to: All families experience some conflict. Families are where you can turn when you are in trouble. Families are very important.)
  3. What are three of the most common sources of conflict between adolescents and their parents? (Answers may include but are not limited to: cell phone or computer use; curfew; friends; schoolwork; household responsibilities; and money.)
  4. Why do adolescents and parents often have conflicts? (Answers may include but are not limited to: this is the time when adolescents move from dependence to independence; parents worry that their adolescents are neither old enough nor experienced enough to be independent; parents often find it difficult to let go of the control they had when adolescents were small children; adolescents want to prove they can be independent even when they are still dependent on their parents for housing, food, clothing and so on.)
  5. What one thing would you most like to change about a relationship in your family?

Life Planning Education, Advocates for Youth, Updated 2009.