by Emily Bridges, Director of Public Information Services

As I was reading this infuriating story Sommer Collins, a high school student suspended for wearing a homemade gay pride t-shirt, I was struck by the matter-of-fact support her parents offered her in both news reports I watched.

“She told me she wanted to make the shirt, and I didn’t see a problem with it……[The school administrator] told me the word ‘homosexual’ refers to a sexual act, and I said no, it refers to a person.”  - Sommer’s mother

“If it offends somebody then they need to get over it.”  - Sommer’s father

We saw the same thing in Spring during the controversy over Constance McMillen’s bid to take her girlfriend to the Prom, the school’s therefore canceling the prom, and the subsequent events.  Throughout the media blitz, Constance’s father was a notable presence, standing by his daughter’s side and speaking up in favor of her rights.

"My daddy told me that I needed to show them that I'm still proud of who I am," McMillen said. "The fact that this will help people later on, that's what's helping me to go on."   

The transgender teen Andy Moreno, forbidden by her principal from running for homecoming queen,  also has a supportive family:

Reporter Roy Appleton spoke to Andy Moreno's mother, who speaks no English but said through her daughter that she supports her child.
"She said whatever he's up for, she supports," said Daisy Moreno, speaking for her mother, Maria.

It’s natural for a parent to want their child to be happy (and not to be suspended).  But what I see in these parents is something new, evidence of changing times.  With their children not even out of their teens, these parents are already well past the “We have to talk about your identity” phase and well into the “Your identity is a part of the you that I love” phase.  

And who are these enlightened parents?  Are they, you know, latte-drinking, hybrid-driving liberals from Vermont?   Are they Ivy League professors, or Lady Gaga?    No.  They are from Texas, Kansas, and Mississippi  - “real America,” if you will, the people the right wing would have you believe are on the other side of the culture war.  Yet these parents are not ashamed  and don’t hate their children’s identity.  Somehow they have determined that their GLBTQ children should be supported, that they deserve love, that their schools and communities must treat them with the dignity and respect all students deserve.  I think THAT is Real America.  I think Real Americans are more than capable of understanding that some people are just gay or trans.  I think they have understood it for decades.  And more and more they’re willing to speak out about it, despite bigoted school officials and unhinged, sickening rhetoric from policitians and anti-gay activists.

Dan Savage had this to say to Constance McMillen’s school district:

Back when our families were likelier to be unsupportive or actively hostile, back when most gay teenagers had to hide their sexual orientations from their parents, bigoted teachers and school officials could discriminate or retaliate against gay teenagers with impunity. Those days are over. Welcome to the future, Itawamba County Schools. 

Yes.  Welcome to the future.   During Ally Week I personally am celebrating parents who are allies to their kids  -  Sommer Collins’ parents, Constance McMillen’s parents, Andy Moreno’s parents, and my own parents, for coming through for their own kids and for the rights of GLBTQ people everywhere.

If you are a parent and interested in learning more about GLBTQ issues, check out Ten Tips for Parents of a Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, or Transgender Child  as well as the rest of the GLBTQ Issues section.